SHORT SMS

SHORT SMS

When all else fails manipulate the data.

All computers wait at the same speed

How do I set the laser printer to stun?

How do you get off a non-stop flight?

If we quit voting will they all go away?

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder

How come night falls but day breaks?

All stressed out and no one to choke

Where there's a will, I want to be in it

Exceptions always outnumber rules

I may not be perfect, but I'm all I got

Anything not nailed down is a cat toy

Adults are just kids who owe money

Constipated people don't give a crap

Never miss a good chance to shut up

How can there be self-help groups?

I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable

"Criminal Lawyer" is a redundancy

I like feminists; I think they're cute

Guilt -- the gift that keeps on giving

Out of Body. Back in Five Minutes

BIGAMIST --- A heavy fog in Italy

The best things in life aren't things

Does killing time damage eternity?

Were you arrested earlier? It's gotta be illegal to look that good

Be unique and different, just say yes. Born Free. . . . .Taxed to Death.

Sorry, I don't date outside my species.

Do not disturb. Already disturbed

If I throw a stick, will you leave?

Do witches run spell checkers?

No guts, no glory, no brain, same story.

When money talks, the criminal walks.

I'm not getting older...I'm getting bitter.

Hi-ho, hi-ho, it's hand grenades I throw.

I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

I'm as confused as a termite in a yo-yo.

I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.

INSTANT HUMAN (Just Add Coffee